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Daniel’s Story
“Daniel’s not doing too well. I don’t think he’s going to make it to the wedding this weekend.”
Daniel and Christy were a couple in their 30’s who had been together for several years, living most of that time out of their car. Only in the last year had they moved into low-income housing, a small apartment that both of them saw as palatial. When Daniel was diagnosed with cancer, it came as a cruel blow. His one wish was to make a commitment to Christy, to have a ceremony that would express his feelings for her in a way she would always remember.
The hospice chaplain spoke up, “I’d be more than happy to do a ceremony for them. How about this afternoon?” Their social worker volunteered to call Daniel and Christy, who readily agreed to the plan, and the team shifted into high gear. A bath aide was sent to the apartment to get Daniel cleaned up and dressed in his best shirt. A nurse volunteered to run to the pawn shop and buy a ring. Another nurse had just received a “thank-you” bouquet of flowers, which she immediately donated for the occasion. The bereavement counselor came up with a couple of candles while other team members created a congratulations card for the whole team to sign.
The chaplain and a nurse arrived at the apartment together. While the chaplain presented the flowers to Christy, the nurse slid a ring box into Daniel’s hand, which he managed, to pocket without Christy seeing. Daniel was too week to stand, so he sat up on the edge of his hospital bed, dressed in gray sweatpants and a very crisp, clean white shirt – his only good shirt. Christy wore a yellow dress that was a bit threadbare but clean. Beaming, every inch a bride, she sat next to Daniel on the bed, the bath aide standing in as her maid of honor while the nurse stood next to Daniel as his best man. The chaplain pulled up a chair so she could sit face to face with the couple, who not only clutched each other’s hand but reached up to hold the hands of their impromptu attendants. The candle flickered as the ceremony began.
“Dearly beloved, we are gather together here in the sight of God and in the presence of these witnesses to join together Daniel and Christy in holy matrimony.” The vows: “I, Christy, take you, Daniel, in sickness and in health, till death do us part.” As they spoke these familiar words to each other, those present felt as if they really heard them for the first time. When Daniel was asked if he had a ring, he pulled the box out of his pocket as if it had been there for weeks and proudly presented it to Christy. The ring was a little big for her finger, but she never noticed. “I got a ring!” she exclaimed, over and over.
The MultiCare Hospice team knows from experience the truth of the statement, “There’s a lot of living to do at the end of life.” Sometimes we are privileged enough to witness it.